Katie's Service

Many of you have followed Katie's journey...Today was Katie's service. I have learned a few things lately that has taught me that it's important to share... not just my work, but more of my heart.  So here goes...

Today I woke up and got dressed in my Sunday best... kissed my girls goodbye... sent them to school,  got into my mini-van... and started to drive. It was a chilly day... the wind whipped leaves around in a parade of vibrant colors. The view as I crossed over the bridge from Fidalgo Island, where Anacortes is located, was filled with cool, frosted farm fields. As I drove closer I saw foothills that had been freshly dusted with powdery snow. The somber valley reflected what my heart was feeling at that moment.

Sad.

Shortly after realizing that correlation, I looked north to Bellingham where Katie's service was being held... where Katie's home was and her loved ones are. My heart swelled as I saw bright, piercing rays of sunshine peeling back the layers of gloom over the city to which I was headed. That's when I felt it... I felt that gift that God was giving to Katie’s family...and all of us that were headed to her service... beautiful rays of sun... just like Katie was to everyone she came in contact with! It was lovely, just like her... and the memories many of us share of her.

I arrived to Historic Bayview Cemetery and memories of past visits flooded in. Having lived in Bellingham for over a decade before moving to Anacortes, I have several friends and loved ones that now reside there. As I entered the Chapel and was seated I noticed the beautiful flowers that surrounded the simple and natural casket. Simple and natural… again, so very much like the Katie that I got to meet. The most wonderful adornments of the room were the hearts, HUNDREDS of huge hearts in those who attended. The love in the room was so thick! The soundtrack of this lovely scene consisted of sweet whispers and soft sniffles. The sound of  hugs and warm embraces.

Peace.

 A Hospice Chaplin spoke about Katie’s overwhelming support from the online community… through her blog and cards and ability to be completely open… sharing herself so willingly with all of us. Katie brought people together from all over the world. I knew that many of my online friends had been thinking and praying for peace and love to be felt by Kevin and their three boys. I felt it there…and if I, having not been very close to Katie and never meeting Kevin before today could feel it, I can only imagine that they did.

Comforting and playful memories were shared by Katie’s best friend… a friendship sparked in the 4^th grade at a birthday slumber party. It was wonderful to hear more about Katie. As her best friend shared… we smiled, cried and even busted out in laughter. Abundant love filled the room.

After saying the Lord’s Prayer and reciting Psalms 23, we watched as Katie’s casket was gently carried to the hearse and toward her final resting place.  We all walked down in a long, silent parade. Steps were mingled with warm embraces and the soundtrack of sniffles still played in surround sound.

I noticed how many historic headstones surrounded where Katie would be. There was such a nostalgic feeling… I couldn’t help but to remember visiting Katie last winter. The Renz home is in a historic part of town… It’s like a little piece of the early 1900’s has been frozen with all of the beautiful period homes. As I sat with her twins and giggled over their toys… I could feel the love in her home. Her new home felt the same…nostalgic and warm… full of history and love.

Beautiful.

I have to admit that at first it was hard looking at the boys, thinking of their futures. As I watched them rise and pat their beautiful Mother’s casket, wishing her goodbye, tears caught in my throat. I’ve lost friends who left small ones behind. It was hard on them… and their Dads. A sense of peace came to me just then. I looked up and took a panoramic view. Love, SO MUCH LOVE was flowing toward Kevin and the boys. Abundantly flowing, with all of the hope in the world for them. I know the road won’t be easy, but with all of that love and support full of loving memories of Katie… I think they will be OK and still have her “there”through them.

I stayed back and watched the guests meander up the hill…I was the next to the last one there.  I contemplated and prayed. It came to me as I sat there… I want to be more like Katie. To be more open and willing to share my heart, to have more courage in the face of adversity… to be more real and feel more of the joy that is available to me. Life is precious… but it’s the people in my life that make it precious. Living isn’t enough… Living and Loving is what it’s all about.

I walked up to Katie’s casket… placed my hand on it and said farewell with a peaceful heart.  As I walked away I softly sang Amazing Grace to myself and thanked my Father in Heaven for all of my blessings and for the blessing of briefly getting to meet and interact with His wonderful Daughter, Katie Renz.

'Till we meet again in Heaven, Katie... Farewell.

 

Comments

[Kate - i {heart} papers]

1.

This is beautiful. Thank you so much for sharing it. I am bawling. I'm so glad you were there and that you're sharing more of yourself with us. :) {{hugs}}

[PK]

2.

Just beautiful, Leese!

[Latisha]

3.

As tears run down my face, thank you for being so open and brave in sharing such a special moment. Very beautiful to read. Thank you for attending and sharing the experience with all of us Lisa <3
{{hugs}}
Latisha

[Margaret C]

4.

Thank you for sharing this xx

[patricia p.]

5.

Thank you so much for sharing Katie's Service with all of us who also felt her loss. I did not know her until I read it over a year ago in a blog and that's when I went to her site.
I was always checking in on her site and followed her progress with always the hope that she would have a healing. When I read of her passing it was a real blow.
I felt that I knew her. She was so open and brave in all the treatments she had gone through.

Thank you for telling us and expressing it all in your own feelings. It was touching. I pray and think about her family. May God watch over all of those who are left when one they loved has passed on.
Help to fill the whole that it leaves..Help them to find a new beginning.

pat

[Noora]

6.

Thanks for sharing this with us, it is so beautiful and authentic, made me cry.

[Robyn]

7.

Thank you so much- I would have so liked to have been there to honour Katie (but I live in Australia so that would have been very difficult !)Your beautiful words and encouragement touched my heart. I'm so glad that there was such peace and love in abundance!

[Jak Heath]

8.

That is so beautiful Lisa, thank you for sharing so openly, I was there in spirit and heart.

[katevdp]

9.

Thank you for sharing this Lisa. I did think of her family today, and I hope they can all find peace. Your descriptive words are beautiful - I could picture it all - so thank you.

[kellijo]

10.

Here I sit at work in my tough girl uniform with tears streaming down my face. My throat is tight, I am filled with saddness... I guess being on the outside and not knowing Katie other than the last bit reading her blog I am not as willing to just accept the pain and loss of a loving person. Her friends are my friends and I read their pain and it hurts me too... it's not all about me, but Damn it HURTS!!!!!

I am glad that you have shared yourself with your online readers, I found this through Facebook and Kate {IHP} and I SO hope you all are healing, I pray the family is "ok" those boys, .... ugh, it just makes me SO angry....

[Joan B]

11.

Thank you Lisa. You gave the rest of us an opportunity to share in Katie's service. I am so grateful that you took the time to share with us.

[Jerusha Borden]

12.

Thank you so much for this. Your writing is so vivid and descriptive, it makes us feel like we were there too. xo

[Sue Ann]

13.

Thank you so much for sharing Lisa, your words make me feel better for the boys .... i cannot stop thinking of them. THANK YOU~

[Susan Todd]

14.

Thank you Lisa. We weren't able to be there, but you made us feel like we were

[Theresia]

15.

Amen, thank you for sharing this with us.

[Lynn]

16.

Lisa, Thank you so much for sharing Katie's service with us. Although I had never met her, her blog certainly made me feel like I had. Sending so many prayers to Kevin and the boys.

[Cheryl]

17.

Oh Lisa, that was just beautiful.

[Linda Monroe]

18.

What a beautiful post. I am praying for Kevin and the boys.

[Donelle u]

19.

Thank you so much for sharing this Lisa - what beautiful writing. You helped me feel some peace with what for me had been a difficult, sad story. I don't feel so empty about these events any more.

[Carolyn Mustopa]

20.

Thank you so much for sharing this. It was just beautiful. I thought about that family all day yesterday, and have tears running down my face right now -- not from sadness as much as from the heart-swelling love that you have described. Thanks again for letting us all feel we were actually there.

[kendra]

21.

What lovely words from your heart Leese. Hugs, Kendra

[~amy~]

22.

Thanks so much for sharing...

[chrisd]

23.

Thanks you so much for sharing your thoughts and impressions of her service with us who were never blessed to have met such a special lady in person. Sending my prayers to Kevin and their boys and their family and friends.

[bonnie weiss]

24.

The world has lost a sweet soul. Your heartfelt tribute to Katie is both beautiful and comforting and may the peace and love from which it was written shine on Kevin and the boys. I always question why these things happen and while we may never understand or know why, it's love that helps us through and keeps us going. Thank you Lisa for sharing your thoughts.

[Curt O'Brien]

25.

Katie was an amazing person. Thank you so much for "taking me" there to her service. I thought about them so much yesterday and it was so amazing to view her service through your eyes. You are a talented writer, and it was so appreciated that you used your talent to share your lovely thoughts of yesterday and of Katie. Hugs, Curt

[Libby]

26.

Thank you for sharing this experience in your beautiful blog post. Sad and heartwarming all at the same time. Sharing may not come as naturally for you but you did a wonderful job with this post, tears were streaming as I read it. Again, thank you!

[Ann weyer]

27.

Thank you for sharing.....we all need to be more open in our lives and enjoy the moments.

[Ted]

28.

Lisa, I can't thank you enough for sharing the service with us. Just knowing that Katie was a daughter of the faith is so completely reassuring to my mom and me. You're a beautiful friend to her and to us for helping us all through this. I look forward to one day meeting Katie as well in our Father's kingdom. Thank you very much!

[Sara Mac]

29.

Lisa this is so beautifully written. Thanks for sharing with us. I'm so glad that you got to be there to support Katie's family and share the love you felt there with us. {{{HUGS}}}

[Jennifer K]

30.

Beautifully stated. And a sweet reminder to us all that loving is an important part of living.

[Maria]

31.

Thank you so much for sharing this, it was beautiful.

[Sankari]

32.

Thank you for sharing this Lisa... I was thinking and sending love to Katie's family yesterday - and to hear you describe everything has just made my heart ache, inspired me to be more open and reminded me about the power of love that transcends all boundaries... sending you big hugs and love, sankari

[Jude]

33.

Wow, you've touched my heart with your openness and ability to share your most inner thoughts. You're an amazing person!

[Sherri]

34.

What a beautiful tribute this is to Katie. Thank you so much for sharing your story. I have been reading her blog since she found out she was sick and she was truly an inspiration to many! She will be missed by so many!! Again, thank you and prayers are with you too.

[jan m]

35.

This is a good reminder of how much we all mean to one another, even if we may never have met. Thank you Lisa. Sending some sunshine to you today!

[Lynne S in TC]

36.

As a follower and an admirer, I have to say that THIS is the most beautiful post you have ever shared. Beyond the power of creativity, paper and stamps, this is such a gift to those of us "out here" in blog land, who have ached, cried and prayed. Thank you Lisa, for sharing this so eloquently...

[Mary H.]

37.

Simply beautiful.

[April W]

38.

What a warm and loving tribute to Katie. Thank you so much for sharing this with us...
- April

[Pat Castillo]

39.

I'm so glad you were able to go and share with us how the family is doing and all the support they're getting. May God continue to grant them peace and strength as they go through these next months of adjusting...

A beautiful post...

[stefanie]

40.

Such a beautiful tribute to a wonderful person. Thanks Leese for sharing your thoughts.
Rest in Peace Dear Sweet Katie.

[roxanne o'brien]

41.

For someone I don't even know, my heart aches for her family and many, many wonderful friends like you left behind. Beautifully written and touching (as I sit here at work with tears running). My thoughts are with her family and all her friends during this difficult time.

[Anna]

42.

This is absolutely beautiful....

[Denise E]

43.

What a beautiful tribute to your friend, so eloquently written. Thank you for sharing that moment with us and allowing us to feel that same love and peace through your words. I, too, had a difficult funeral last week; a friend who died too young, and suddenly. It makes us reevaluate our lives and put our priorities in line and make time for what's important. Thanks again for sharing this with us. Take care. Hugs to you.

[dooduhh]

44.

Lisa, What a beautiful, from-the-heart share & so eloquently stated! May God Bless.

[Lynn Mercurio]

45.

So touching and heartfelt Lisa. Thank you for sharing your experience of the day with those of us who wanted to attend, but could not.

[Account Deleted]

46.

Oh Lisa, your words filled my heart today. Tears of sadness and love. Thank you.

[Cindy]

47.

Lisa
What a beautiful tribute to Katie.
Cindy

[Francie]

48.

Lisa, this was a beautifully written post. Thank you so much for sharing it with us.

[Lynda Marquez]

49.

Thank you, Lisa, for allowing us to share in the experience with you. You helped me to feel some closure in Katie's ordeal, since I did not know her personally, but only through the stamping community.

[Becky Sorensen]

50.

Beautiful! I was there, probably about the third of fourth person that left before you, my husband and a friend stood there with me, until my husband and I walked to her casket, and I patted it and said my goodbye! I watched all the people walk back up that small hill from her gravesite, and I thought of all of those who were also with us in spirit, it was a wonderous sight! Thank you for your description, it was perfect! And I remember when Katie said you had come up, she enjoyed your visit!!

[Patricia G.]

51.

Thanks for your beautiful post. So inspiring...

[Julie M]

52.

Lisa: What a beautiful post about someone who has touched your heart deeply. Thank you for sharing what had to be a very emotional day.

[Peg]

53.

Thank you so much for sharing this with all of us in the blogosphere who couldn't be there. You write beautifully and I really feel as if I understand the way things went. I'm sure it wasn't easy so thank you!

[LaurieJ]

54.

Thank you so much for this beautiful post, Lisa. You touched my heart in much the same way Katie did.

[Mary K]

55.

Thank you for sharing with us--I am one of many who was there in spirit and am glad to hear that Katie had such a beautiful service.

[Terri M]

56.

Thank you for sharing.

[Candy Fosta]

57.

This is a beautiful tribute to Katie. I will never forget how excited she was when you visited her. Katie and I have been friends for a few years when we started on a DT together. We faithfully ordered PTI together at midnight on the 14th of every month. It was our standing date and it is something that I really missed last night. Sharing herself was truly her gift to others. She will be sadly missed but her memory will live on through the hearts of all those that she touched. Thank you for sharing this beautiful tribute to her.

[Cathy Weber]

58.

I came to your blog today to check out your beautiful release cards, but instead came away smiling from your beautiful tribute to Katie. I think it is wonderful that you could share all the positives that can be seen from her life and memorial service. Thank you so much for sharing this with us all.

[laura j]

59.

thank you for writing this post Lisa..... beautifully written..

[Tameko]

60.

Thanks for sharing your heart with us.

[Karen Brandt]

61.

Simply beautiful! Your words touched my heart and gave me some closure. I never knew Katie, or her family, but I have held her close in my heart over the past year. How lucky we are that you shared so openly with us, thank you.

[Susan]

62.

This is such a lovely tribute to a beautiful young woman ... my heart goes out to her husband and children. Although she has passed through the garden gate, the pain on this side will take longer to subside. I know God will hold this family in His loving hands until they all meet again.

[Mististamps4fun]

63.

♥♥♥

[Stephanie L]

64.

Dear Lisa, I only learned of Katie and her journey recently when the "Swimming" fundraiser began. I felt such an immediate connection. I received a cancer diagnosis almost 3 years ago. The first thing I saw in my mind's eye when I heard those words was my 9 year old twins growing up without me. I am fine as far as I know at this moment, but stories like Katie's pierce my soul. My heart has been breaking since I began to read Katie's blog, and yet, I have felt so blessed to "see" and feel the grace with which Katie and Kevin traveled this path. What an example. What beauty. I live on the east coast and I so wanted to know what Katie's service would be like. You have painted it so well for us, and I am so grateful that you did. Thank you for this gift, and for your part in this amazing community of artists who share something so special. Peace and blessings to you and yours.
Stephanie

[Evie C.]

65.

That was such a moving tribute. You really have a gift for writing...I was so touched. Thank you for sharing your heart.

[Judy McMcMullen]

66.

Beautifully said, Lisa. Thanks for sharing. Smiling as I wipe away the tears.

[Karen Emerson]

67.

Lisa, thank you so much for putting into words the warmth and love felt yesterday at Katie's service. The weather had been so glum and I didn't want that for her send off. Brenda, who has been part of our family since she and Katie met in grade school spoke so beautifully about Katie. I hadn't expected to, but I truly do feel "better" today than I have in quite a while. Katie is at peace and no longer in pain. Kevin and the boys will love and support each other and the rest of the family will stay close and support them as well. Again, thank you for your beautiful words. Karen Emerson (Katie's mom)

[Jessie McLaughlin]

68.

Lisa Thank you so much for sharing with us. Thank you.

[Niki Estes]

69.

Beautiful tribute and post, Lisa. It's been such a sad journey and I'm glad there was some peace for her family and friends. My thoughts and prayers are with them. Thank you for sharing with those of us who could only be there in spirit.

[cards by cara]

70.

Oh, Lisa ... what a beautiful post. Thank you so much for sharing that with all of us that couldn't be there. I am sniffling at your heartfelt words.

[janet wilson]

71.

A heartfelt and bittersweet tribute to a special friend.
I'm sorry for your loss, Lisa.

[Stacy aka Twinshappy]

72.

Thank you for the beautiful account of the service as I was unable to attend. Katie was a very special child of God indeed!

[sharon]

73.

......gorgeous....

[MargieH]

74.

Lisa, thank you so much for sharing. It was beautiful!!

[Kim L.]

75.

Lisa, that was beautifully written. Hugs to you.

[True :D]

76.

Beautiful! :)

Hugs,
True :D

[Marilyn]

77.

Thank you Lisa for sharing this. I'm in the midst of the 'ugly cry' right now but so happy at the same time that it was a beautiful day for Katie and that love and peace filled the service. It couldn't have been easy for you to write this, you most certainly honored Katie. She made a lasting change in me as well and I am grateful to have found her.

[Mary V]

78.

Lisa - thank you for this post. I didn't have a chance to meet Katie personally but knew her through Close To My Heart. Your story touched me and as I sit here with tears in my eyes, I want you to know that this tribute to her is truly inspirational and lovely. My heart goes out to her family at this time and I know there are so many grieving with them. Thank you again for sharing.

[Jill Norwood]

79.

I have tears streaming down my face....thank you so much for sharing this....I would have loved to drive to Bellingham to the service but my husband is fighting a grade 4 brain cancer and I am his caregiver. You allowed all of us so share in the service which I can tell was filled with love and peace. Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts and feelings....it means so much! God bless you and your family and Katie's family. My continued prayers are with everyone that is standing up to cancer and fighting the good fight each day! Eat green everyone - cancer can not live in an alkaline environment!

[christine Nixon]

80.

Lisa, I am writing to tell you that I am so impressed with you. I was so pleased to meet you at Stamp-A-Fair and noticed how you took special care to actually interact with everyone at your make&take table and to make each of us feel like we mattered. You interacted so well with the other team members also. And, now, this piece for Katie Renz. I feel like I experienced this day with you. It was so well-written and descriptive. Job well done, Lisa. You are special.

[Maxine]

81.

Beautiful words..! You said you did not know her all that well BUT the piece of you that did was left with a BIG impact. Her purpose in life was fulfilled in many ways...one being able to touch you so. Take care and peace will follow!!

[Lori Boyd]

82.

Hi Lisa! My name is Lori. It is so nice to "meet" you! I sit here wiping tears, but my heart if full. Thank you for sharing this and for allowing us to "be there" through you! Thank you for helping me to feel a peace about Kevin and the boys. I will carry your words about them and how you believe they will be okay with all the amazing Love surrounding them. I needed to read that. Thank you! Blessings - LORi BOYD

[Sue Kment]

83.

What a tender and wonderful tribute to our dear Katie. Thank you for sharing with us all.

[Clare Buswell]

84.

Thank you for sharing this, it's beautiful.

[Christi Bryant]

85.

What a beautiful, poetic tribute to a beautiful and poetic person. I was touched by Katie thru clear dollar stamps design team and by her blog. We also shared a hometown, My husband and I are from Bellingham ourselves and we were married in Anacortes - skyline, where my grandparents still live. I hoped to get to visit Katie the next time I made it up to Washington to visit my family.
Thank you so much for sharing your feelings and experiences at Katie's memorial service, I know we all would have loved to been able to attend. She touched SO SO many people all around the world.
Thanks again
Christi Bryant

[eleftheria]

86.

THANK YOU ,THANK YOU, THANK YOU! For those of us who live at the other end of the world and couldn't make it to Katie's service, your description is precious!Katie's grace touched all of us so much.Thank you

[Debbie S]

87.

Beautifully written Lisa! Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts, observations and feelings regarding Katie's service. I had been following Katie's blog for some time and her life's journey has touched me also. Your writing is such a wonderful tribute to Katie's life. Thank you again.

[Jennifer W]

88.

What an amazing post!

[Mary Lou Kemp]

89.

Thank you for sharing this beautifully written tribute to your friend. It has touched my heart.

[Claire]

90.

Thank you so much Lisa for such a loving and beautiful tribute to a wonderful lady.I could not be there on monday so I lit a candle for her and said my own modest tribute.You described the service so well that I can feel I was there. Katie touched my life long before she became ill and changed my outlook on life during her painful journey, like you say sharing is important in life. She will never be forgotten.
Claire xxx

[Kristen]

91.

This is just beautiful. Thank you for sharing your heart....

[Kristie H]

92.

Thanks for sharing Katie's memorial with us....it was so comforting to feel like I could share in it through you. I also wanted to say in response about your nervousness about this post given the negativity lately on the forum that I love the generosity I've experienced with the DT. The DT's work is so inspirational and giving of your talent. At least from me....please know your creative work, your generous spirit, and wonderful blog posts are very much appreciated.

[Wordbird]

93.

Beautiful tribute to Katie, Lisa. Thank you for sharing your precious thoughts.

[Candy]

94.

Thank you for sharing this lovely tribute. I didn't know Katie, but like several others I read her story and even made contributions when I could. I take great comfort in knowing that when one of God's children passes on from this life, that they are only sleeping. One day he will gently whisper "awaken my child" and Katie will take her predestined place by his side. Thanks again for sharing.

[Winnie Dolderer]

95.

Lovely post Lisa. I am sure she was there with all of you in spirit. I have been following her online for quiet some time and felt the love she exuded. I lost my husband to this dreaded disease when I was 40, and I know that Kevin and the boys will be fine, it will be hard, but I can tell by the way he took care of Katie and the boys that he will be blessed. Thanks for sharing yourself with us. It is truly a gift.

[Melinda Wharton]

96.

You are well on your way toward your goal of being more open and willing to share your heart - thanks for sharing.
Much love to you from just a reader in blogland...

[cjurek]

97.

What a beautiful account of Katie's funeral. It seems like you have found peace, hope and a purpose.

[Lauren]

98.

Thank you for sharing this Lisa. Katie will always be with us.

[Scmoore48]

99.

Thank you for sharing your heart with us. Your words perfectly conveyed the heartbreaking yet peace filled time in this family's life.

Katie was special to so many and she left that gift behind we should all strive for that.

Thank you again. God bless you.

[Helen F.]

100.

Thank you so much, Lisa. What a beautiful sharing of your heartfelt sympathy for Katie. She will be sorely missed in the Blog Community, but certainly never forgotten. Love, comfort and peace to Katie, her beautiful family and friends. God Bless.